


When Potions and Curses Collide

by Sherlaufeyson



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Queen (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-21 01:16:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6032779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sherlaufeyson/pseuds/Sherlaufeyson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>c.1998 in the Harry Potter Universe (Bri and Rog are ~17)</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Potions and Curses Collide

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this many years ago on Livejournal under a pseudonym, just in case anyone recognises it.

Severus Snape usually gave the skinny boy from Ravenclaw a bit of a break. Not that he was getting soft, just that he saw so much of himself in the isolated, studious boy that he couldn’t quite bring himself to lash out the usual undeserved personal attacks to an already depressed kid.

But when he saw the seventh slice of humulus root land in one of his own students’ hair while they were preparing Veritaserum, he snapped. 

“May, Taylor, you will both stay 15 minutes after class.”

Brian looked up resignedly, only sighing softly before returning to add the last of the ingredients to his cauldron. Snape chose to ignore the fleeting look of triumph that passed over Taylor’s face.

\-------------------

“I was only trying to get his attention, Sir - ”

“He’s always spinning tales for the other professors –“

“You see, he put a jinx on me, Sir –“

“I don’t want to hear it.” Snape said, his voice dropping to a low pitch which sent chills through the spines of the students.

“But, Sir!”

“Silence, May! Taylor, prepare a flask of your own solution for Mr May.”

Brian’s eyes widened in fear. He well knew that Roger had had it in for him since they’d started Hogwarts. Usually it had been obvious jealousy over grades, but lately the fair haired boy had been even more antagonistic towards him, and he did wonder if it had become an ingrained habit.

Roger’s blue eyes flashed with devious intent as he handed the flask to Brian. Snape waved his wand over the solution, presumably checking for curses, although Brian surmised that he may as well have been adding his own to the mix. He shifted uncomfortably, his hands clasped awkwardly in front of him.

“Drink up boy, quickly.” Snape ordered Brian. Reluctantly, Brian obeyed, glaring through his eyelashes at his professor as he lowered his head to drink.

“Why were you flicking shredded humulus root at Mr Taylor’s head?”

Brian looked down, scuffing his shoes.

“Answer, May.”

Snape’s tone took on a menacing quality as he rounded on Roger, “Why is your potion not working?”

“I - I don’t know, Sir,” Roger stuttered.

Brian began to answer for him, “He put a curse on –“

“Shut up, boy” Snape snarled at the older student.

“What curse did you put on Mr May?”

For the first time, Roger did look rather embarrassed. He began mumbling his answer to his shoes.

“What was that, Taylor?”

“Semi-erectus eris,” Roger barely managed to whisper the words out while his cheeks flamed.

“And do you know why that particular curse will affect the potion?”

“No,” the fair-haired boy looked frantically at Brian for an answer out of habit.

Brian looked up as if to speak, then down again, wishing he could be anywhere else. He’d take Trelawney giving him false predictions about the fate of England’s wildlife over this any day.

“Where does the blood divert from and to, with that spell?”

Roger wracked his brain, trying to remember something from the mandatory Wizarding Health classes in first year. “From the brain to the...”

“Yes?”

“Cock?” Roger whispered the last word to the frayed ends of his wizarding robes.

“Right, and what is required for Veritaserum?”

“Me-memory?” Roger stuttered.

“So if the blood is flowing AWAY from the brain, the potion is rendered far less effective. You have a week’s worth of detentions boy. Now undo the curse.”

Roger looked up at his professor, then to his left where his classmate, the bane of his existence was standing.

“I don’t know it, Sir.”

Snape spelled out for him, rapidly losing any shred of fairness and patience he had left “Fi-ni-te-“

“Oh! Yes, I get it, sorry professor.” Roger said quickly. “Finite incantatem,” he mumbled and Brian’s sharp intake of breath and immediate relaxed position indicated that his physiological state had returned to normal.

“Now, where do you think you’re going, May?” Snape sneered at the curly-haired boy who had been edging to the door since being relieved of his recent condition.

“Herbology, Sir,” Brian answered respectfully, hoping that he would be allowed to leave.

“You will stay here until I decide you may leave.”

“Now, Taylor, Fill another flask for Mr May, and one for yourself.”

When both boys had finished taking the potion, they were sat down on opposing benches; awaiting questioning from their professor.

“What on Earth possessed you to curse Mr May in that way?”

\-------------three periods earlier---------

Hermione turned around, eyes flashing as Brian kept charming her hair to keep to the left, which had the nasty side effect of causing each strand to deliver a miniscule electric shock to the side of her neck. While the itch was minor, it did make focussing on engorgement charms rather difficult to concentrate on. She’d already succeeded in blowing Crookshanks’ tail up five times its natural size.

“I’m sorry, Brian. But this cat will continue to suffer if you don’t stop making me lose my concentration.”

Brian ignored her in favour of staring past her with the same dopey expression he’d been sporting all term.

She huffed and flicked her hair back to the same position, returning to her job of restoring the physical size specifications of her cat.

Brian let out a huff of annoyance, “Hermy, can’t you move to the left a bit?”

Hermione scowled again. “Brian, if it’s that important for you to spend another hour staring at Taylor’s arse, why don’t you just ask to switch places with me?”

Brian’s face took on a beetroot red colour as he trained his eyes down on his admittedly unopened charms textbook.

Hermione took pity on him, “Just ask him out, Brian. What’s the worst that can happen?”

She received an incredulous look, “What – I don’t, How do you,” Brian spluttered. “Just shut up, Hermione.”

“Suit yourself, then.” She replied as she thankfully moved another half a foot to the left, giving Brian the perfect view of the perfect material stretched perfectly tight across Roger Taylor’s perfect, perfect arse. 

“OK, you may lower your wands, class dismissed,” squeaked Professor Flitwick. Brian lowered his wand, shoving it and his still unopened textbook in his bag. As he moved he became more aware of the rather uncomfortable bulge in his trousers. He thanked Merlin’s balls that he went to a wizarding school where robes tended to cover up such physiological embarrassments. 

As he moved past Taylor’s desk he heard a muttered word which sounded suspiciously like a curse. However, as he felt no different, he thought nothing of it and walked out of his classroom and down the corridor, stopping to converse with Sir Cadogan before hurrying up to Divination with the Hufflepuffs. 

\-------------------------Three periods later-----------------------

It was about the time that the two young men started tearing each others’ robes off in a frenzy that Snape backed out of his own study, secure in the knowledge that any mess he found would result in several weeks’ worth of entertaining detentions for the both of them. An embarrassed student meant a hard working one, and he had several hundreds of vile potions ingredients that required bottling and labelling before the end of term.


End file.
